Never a Hopeless Case: Laura Turns 2 Today

Today, I am two years sober.

That’s two full years without a hangover, drunk crying, causing a scene, puking in the shower, picking fights with people, passing out at parties, hiding drinks, doing cocaine, drunk driving, and many other horrifying nightmares. 

Two years ago today, I was once again profoundly hungover. As always, I knew the only thing that would quiet my anxiety and make me feel better was to drink. I poured a 24oz beer into a 24oz cup and sat down on my couch to drink it. It was 11 am on a Thursday.

Instead of picking up the beer (like I had thousands of times in the past), I drove myself to the emergency room. That was the best decision I ever made. 

But, I don’t even know if I made that decision for myself. I’m pretty sure something else made it for me because I don’t think I could’ve ever quit on my own. My addiction to alcohol was that bad. So, some kind of divine intervention happened that day which is wild because I never really believed in any of that shit. 

In the two years since I stopped drinking, I’ve quit a lifelong nail-biting habit, I quit smoking cigarettes, lost 40 lbs., started this blog, made a ton of new friends, and I genuinely believe I am happier and healthier than I have ever been in my entire adult life.

All I had to do was give up one thing — alcohol— and I got everything in return. 

But by far, the best thing that’s happened in the past two years is that I am no longer drinking myself to death every day. 

Every day that I don’t drink, I level up. Each day that I am sober, I give myself the opportunity to live a happy life. And while getting sober is hard as fuck, and some days fucking suck, every day that I don’t drink is a success. And that’s because if I didn’t stop drinking, it probably would have killed me by now. There were also days when I couldn’t stitch together an hour sober. So a full 24 hours sober is still a miracle to me. 

So, I’m proud of myself, and I hate to toot my own horn, but TOOT TOOT!

Laura E. Stillwagon

Laura is co-creator and writer at The Wagon. She’s written for Newsday, ran a marathon and fallen off bar stools. At 2+ years sober, she currently lives on Long Island, NY with her husband and little dog.