When I realized that I had a drinking problem, I immediately told myself I would moderate how much I drank. If I could just control my drinking, then I wouldn’t have to give it up. I told myself I would only drink on weekends, I would only go out for one beer after work, I […]
In the Shadows: How Active Addiction Leads to Isolation
Even though alcohol is considered a social substance, many people who become dependent on it find themselves feeling alone. When my drinking was at its worst, I could be in a room surrounded by people and still feel absolutely isolated. Active alcoholism kept me separate from my friends and family, my hobbies, my work, and […]
Relapse Is Not Failure: Moving Past A Common Recovery Experience
Five years ago, a medical scare got me sober from alcohol and on my 150th day alcohol-free, I relapsed. I had a family trip to Ireland on the horizon which I was anxious about, and I decided I couldn’t be sober during that trip. So three weeks ahead of it, I drank. After that relapse, […]
Shamrocks and Sobriety: A Sober Alcoholic Reflects on St. Patrick’s Day
Parades, corned beef, shamrocks, and wearing green are just a few ways people celebrate Ireland’s foremost patron saint, St. Patrick every year on March 17th. But the 40 shades of green and Irish dinner aside, most people mark this holiday with drinking — a lot of drinking. And that’s probably because this holiday is associated […]
Super Bowl Sunday Aftermath: From the End Zone to the Office
When I was still drinking, Super Bowl Sunday was always followed by a dreadful, hungover Monday. Even though I never watched sports, or cared about anything other than my pool numbers, I always drank like a monster. While some drinkers can turn any old day into a drinking occasion, certain calendar markers can become just […]
Rock Bottom: A Sometimes Scary Means to Change
Webster’s definition of rock bottom is “the lowest point possible.” While the expression can be used to identify low points on Earth, people hitting rock bottom from a substance use disorder can feel lower than the lowest points on the planet. What is a rock bottom? Hitting rock bottom means […]
A New Years Resolution to Never Have a New Years Resolution
Every year on January 1st, I listen to “New Year’s Day” by U2. The line, “all is quiet, on New Year’s Day” always feels real to me. Something about the holiday has a kind of calm, silent, and weird feeling to it. The madness of the holidays is over (thank god), it still gets dark […]
How We Remember Matthew Perry Matters
Ketamine and Matthew Perry. Two things that few Friends fans would have associated with each other before this week. But after the full release of the late actor’s autopsy report on Friday, the dissociative anesthetic and the beloved sitcom star are forever linked. And it’s really unfortunate. And unfair.
Setting Sail on Dry Seas with a Sobriety Challenge: Dry January
Been on a bender through December? Up for a challenge? Dry January is approaching and anyone can participate. Dry January is a challenge where people voluntarily abstain from drinking alcohol for the entire month of January. Some people participate in Dry January as a healthy way to kick off […]
Mother God: How Insulation in Addiction Leads to Catastrophe
Amy Carlson was a 45-year-old, mentally ill alcoholic who thought she was God. This shocking three-part MAX Documentary “Love Has Won: The Cult of Mother God” follows a delusional new-age hippie and her worshiping lackeys as they enable her into an early grave.
A Night You Can’t Remember: Alcohol Induced Blackouts
What’s worse than recalling an embarrassing thing you did while you were drinking? Not remembering anything at all. Coming to the realization that you were in a blackout can be a scary way to wake up. You may ask yourself a variety of horrifying questions, including, “What did I do? What happened? How did I […]