Whether you're on it, off it, or somewhere in between
Everyone in recovery is different, and every trigger — those things that make us crave a drink — is different for every person in recovery. If you take a big fat Ketel One martini filled with olives and stick it right under my nose, there’s a 99.9% chance that I’ll be triggered to drink it. Or if you force me to smell a chilled, crisp white wine, then yeah, I’m going to want to taste that.
Last year, my husband and I decided to quit smoking cigarettes. Along with my vanity and health, the cost was a huge motivator as at $16 a pack on Long Island, we were spending far too much money on early graves. We chose a quit date of November 1st, and off we went. While I […]
The “one day at a time” mantra is used frequently in recovery. And I have to be honest — I couldn’t stand the saying for many, many years. It made me think of the TV show “One Day at a Time” and its incredibly catchy and annoying theme song, which would then stay lodged in […]
On account of my drinking, I have missed out on a lot. I had to be taken home early from my sister-in-law’s wedding because I was annihilated. I was too hungover to go to my niece’s dance recital. I missed countless days of work due to raging hangovers or because I was still drunk from […]
When we first come into recovery, whether by way of rehab, counseling, or a 12-step group, many of us are inundated with new experiences. Our days may be filled with therapy, support group meetings, and other activities designed to show us a new way to live. But as we learn to integrate these techniques into […]
When I was still drinking, Super Bowl Sunday was always followed by a dreadful, hungover Monday. Even though I never watched sports, or cared about anything other than my pool numbers, I always drank like a monster. While some drinkers can turn any old day into a drinking occasion, certain calendar markers can become just […]
As I lay in bed leveled with COVID for the fifth day in a row, I am reminded of how I used to drink through illness. It didn’t matter how sick I was, I would always drink. And that’s because I drank every day, so being sick was no exception. It may be surprising to […]
Valentine’s Day is a divisive holiday and I understand why some people hate it. Whether you’re coupled or uncoupled, sober or active, it can stir up uncomfortable emotions around all kinds of relationships — including toxic ones. My most toxic relationship was the one I had with alcohol and sometimes it’s helpful for me to […]
For many of us who suffer from substance use disorder, everyday can start to feel the same when in active addiction. Like the movie Groundhog Day, where Phil Connors (Bill Murray) relives the same day over and over again, each day started to feel identical when I was drinking. While the circumstances of each day […]
For years I was really into journaling, writing nightly with a pen onto a bound book of beautiful empty pages. Then one day, I stopped. As far as I can figure, this occurred around the time Wi-Fi came into my life and my apartment. Instead of bringing my journal into bed with me, I brought […]
On my two-year sober anniversary, I received a text from my buddy that read: “Your sobriety helps more people than you will ever know.” I thanked him, said “yeah right” to myself, and forgot about it. But a bit later on, I realized he might be right. And that’s because since I got sober, I […]