Whether you're on it, off it, or somewhere in between
Many times throughout my drinking career, I tried to sober up, and each time I had the dilemma of when to tell people. It was really nobody’s business but my own, but for whatever reason, I felt the need to tell people right away. Maybe I wanted to hold myself accountable, or perhaps it was […]
When I decided to get sober, I sought help from a recovery program to help me stop drinking. Based on countless “whiteknuckle” attempts at sobriety on my own, I realized I could not do it alone and I needed help. In my desperation, I decided to give a recovery program a try — even though […]
I knew my relationships were going to change when I got sober, and once I learned I could live life without alcohol, I became less focused on drinking or not drinking and more focused on my personal growth. I did not want to be a dry drunk, so I knew that I had to make […]
The thought of getting sober petrified me, so I continued drinking for a long time to avoid a horrifying unknown. How would I live without alcohol? I couldn’t imagine life without it and I was convinced that my life would be over if I gave it up. But that’s what being addicted to a substance […]
When I first learned that meditation was considered a key tool for staying sober (especially if you follow a 12-step program), I thought I was doomed. I grew up in New York City. I’ve always felt comfortable in chaos. Silence scares me (or it used to, at least), so I was none too eager to […]
So you got sober, and now you don’t know how to relax. I didn’t know how to either. If you are anything like me, my substance was involved in every facet of my life. Whatever my mood and whatever the occasion, I drank. So, once the alcohol was gone, I was completely lost. Not only […]
Everyone in recovery is different, and every trigger — those things that make us crave a drink — is different for every person in recovery. If you take a big fat Ketel One martini filled with olives and stick it right under my nose, there’s a 99.9% chance that I’ll be triggered to drink it. Or if you force me to smell a chilled, crisp white wine, then yeah, I’m going to want to taste that.
The “one day at a time” mantra is used frequently in recovery. And I have to be honest — I couldn’t stand the saying for many, many years. It made me think of the TV show “One Day at a Time” and its incredibly catchy and annoying theme song, which would then stay lodged in […]
On account of my drinking, I have missed out on a lot. I had to be taken home early from my sister-in-law’s wedding because I was annihilated. I was too hungover to go to my niece’s dance recital. I missed countless days of work due to raging hangovers or because I was still drunk from […]
When we first come into recovery, whether by way of rehab, counseling, or a 12-step group, many of us are inundated with new experiences. Our days may be filled with therapy, support group meetings, and other activities designed to show us a new way to live. But as we learn to integrate these techniques into […]
Valentine’s Day is a divisive holiday and I understand why some people hate it. Whether you’re coupled or uncoupled, sober or active, it can stir up uncomfortable emotions around all kinds of relationships — including toxic ones. My most toxic relationship was the one I had with alcohol and sometimes it’s helpful for me to […]